Alas, I shall leave you now with the final installment of Jean's Halloween Related Link O' The Day: Ghost Research Society

Have a safe and happy Great Pumpkin Day.

Note to self: Don't store individual meds in same compartment in pencil drawer as thumbtacks.

Evolution of a DBZ otaku:

1. Stay home on Friday night to watch Space Ghost: Coast to Coast. Afterward, sit through Bugs Bunny cartoons waiting for Freakazoid, trying to ignore the censoring and tampering that has been done to make such classic cartoons into watered down, PC ghosts of their former selves. Damn Ted Turner. Watch Freakazoid. Lose remote. Decide freaky little Japanese cartoon won't be too distracting if left on while you read.
2. Glance at television while turning page of book. Realize scary green guy with antennae has just kidnapped small child with tail and abandoned him in the wilderness. Decide you don't care for animated depictions of child abuse, even of freaky little children with tails. Go back to reading. Glance up again to see small child transforming into King Kong. Decide Japanese animators are all a bunch of demented freaks. Go back to reading. Glance up again to see green guy obliterate the moon. Think to self: "He just blew up the moon!" Watch as King Kong shrinks back into small child with tail. Wait for the fact that there is no longer a moon in the sky to wreak havoc on planet. Watch as green guy violently rips tail off of small child (now sans tail). Wait for earthquakes and tidal waves to ravage planet. Realize none of that is happening. Think to self: "Oh, now that's just totally not realistic. That would have completely thrown off the Earth's gravitational balance, and you expect us to believe that the planet suffered no consequences whatsoever for Angry Green Guy's little moon shattering temper tantrum? What do you take us for?" Ignore fact that moon shattering temper tantrum, green guy with anennae, and small lychanthropic child with tail are all pretty unrealistic in and of themselves. Realize that show is ending on a cliffhanger. Throw down book in disgust. Go to bed.
   
3. Wait a week. Watch SG:C2C, Bugs Bunny, & Freakazoid, as always. Intentionally leave television tuned to freaky little Japanese cartoon. Tell self you just want some background noise while you work on your web site. Look up at the words, "Last time on Dragon Ball Z!" Realize announcer is not recapping the episode you watched last week. Realize cartoon must be shown daily rather than weekly. Realize you have no hope of ever figuring out what's going on. Give up and go to bed.
   
4. Wait several weeks. Call in sick. Drag self out of bed at 3 to watch Thundercats. Think to self: "Thundercats beats He-Man's ass all to hell." Doze off during Sailor Moon. Wake up with a start upon hearing now recognizable opening sounds of DragonBall Z theme. Sit up and pay attention. Realize dumb-ass dead father of lychanthropic little freak job is now alive. Wonder how the hell that happened. See Green Guy, whose name you have now determined is actually Picollo, get his arm sliced off. Think to self: "Whoa!" Think short guy with pointy hair has a lot of good lines. Root for him. Realize he's the villain. Stop rooting for him. Watch Picollo regenerate his arm. Say out loud: "Whoa!" Wonder why short bald guy has no nose. Think to self: "That's just wrong." See frightening little doll boy and guy with three eyes. Say out loud: "Ahh!" Become creeped out. Think to self for twentieth time, "Japanese animators are freaks!" Curse as episode ends on a cliffhanger.
   
5. Wait a day. Realize you feel better. Consider calling in sick anyway so you can watch DragonBall Z. Think better of it. Set VCR to tape it instead.
   
6. Begin taping it regularly. Decide you really like the pointy-haired short guy, whose name you now know is Vegeta, even if he is a villain. Realize he's a lot more fun to root for than the dumb-ass hero, whose name you've learned is Goku, even though Vegeta keeps calling him Kakarott. Decide "Kakarott" must be Saiyan for "dumb-ass." Decide to root for Vegeta from here on in.
   
7. Discover web site, The MST3K-ing of DBZ. Read and laugh. Learn that Kakarott is not in fact Saiyan for "dumb-ass," but is in actuality Goku's birth name. Figure out that he's basically supposed to be some sort of Japanese version of Superman. Realize you've pretty much just been caught up on all of the plot so far.
8. Begin referring to show as, simply, "DBZ." Begin referring to all freaky little Japanese cartoons reverently as "anime," except for Pokemon, because you really hate Pokemon and you refuse to classify it in the same category with the brilliant work of art that is DBZ.
   
9. See commercial for DBZ toys. Cheer. Drop stupid amount of money on toys at Toys 'R' Us. Display proudly on desk at workplace. Ignore comments from coworkers. Figure out way to work images of DBZ characters and/or toys into site design. Consider purchase of toys money well spent.
   
10. Watch as Vegeta proves to be not totally evil after all. Start to think it would be "kinda neat" if he got together with that mouthy blue-haired chick, Bulma. Watch as he dies horribly. Curse violently at screen. Watch as he gets wished back to life. Cheer.
    
11. Realize the season has ended. Watch week after week of reruns. Curse violently at screen. Buy a DBZ video to get you through withdrawals. Cheer at announcement that new episodes will air soon. Watch new episodes. Realize that they are the same episodes on the video you purchased and already watched three weeks ago. Curse violently at screen.
    
12. Repeat the last step, this time dropping $80 on an entire saga's worth of "uncut" videos. While watching videos, realize that the censorship that occurs before the episodes air on Toonami is just ridiculous. I mean, taking out the blood and gore is one thing, but airbrushing out Bulma's dad's cigarette? That's just a bit much. Decide to give up on Cartoon Network and stick to the uncut videos from now on. Realize that Vegeta and Bulma actually are going to get together. Giggle like a school girl. Realize that the plot has just jumped ahead three years without actually showing Vegeta and Bulma getting together. Curse violently at screen. Realize Vegeta is now a good guy. Cheer.
    
13. Scour Internet for fan fiction depicting Vegeta and Bulma getting together. Realize that there are a lot of perverted little DBZ fans out there. Find some good fanfic. Read it, but be sure not to tell anybody, because, I mean, come on. You're pushing 30, and you're reading fan fic about a couple of cartoon characters. You don't want that to get around the office. Realize that some of the fan fic is actually better written than the show on which it's based. Realize also that the people writing this fan fic all seem to know a great deal more about the show than you do because they've seen fan-subbed bootlegs of the entire series in the original Japanese, and/or they've read all of the manga. Become jealous. Curse violently.
    
14. Consider buying fan-subbed bootlegs in the original Japanese and/or buying all of the manga. Realize you can't afford to do that. Curse violently.
    
15. Opt instead to scour the internet for information. Learn during the process that not only are ridiculously harmless things such as cigarette smoking and bodily fluids censored from the American version, but that the English dubs are often not direct translations of the Japanese, but are instead cleaned up, censored, kid friendly pseudo-translations. Become indignant. Determine to start buying the manga next payday so you can see what you've been missing.
    
16. Cease referring to yourself as "a fan."
17. Begin instead referring to yourself as "otaku."
    
18. Read extensive, detailed episode guides and plot summaries. Fail to stop at the point you've left off in your viewing. Spoil all future episodes for yourself.
    
19. Purchase the manga. Begin buying and trading of fan-subbed bootlegs. Become smug in your knowledge of all things DBZ. Lord it over those who have only ever seen the show on Cartoon Network and have no idea what they're missing. Adopt a condescending attitude toward Cartoon Network and Funimation. Watch the show on television regularly, just so you can point out the stupid dubs and the instances of censorship.
    
20. Get over it. Put your toys, manga, and videos in storage. Go back to obsessing over Star Wars, or move on to a brand new obsession.
    

Right now I'm on #18. Please help me.

So when you're happy (Hooray!)
Or sad (Awww!)
Or frightened (Eeek!)
Or mad (Rats!)
Or excited (Wow!)
Or glad (Hey!)
An interjection starts a sentence right!

Can't you just feel the love?

These are going on my daily list. I'm just listing them here for my own reference. spitfire! and toshikazu211. The first one I've been meaning to add for a really long time now and keep forgetting. The second one I just found today but he cracked me up, so I'll be going back to that one. Plus he's a Christian. It's always nice to find a fellow cool Christian amongst all you heathen bloggers. Yeah, that's right, I said heathen. Deal.

I've finally decided. I'm going to write in Erich for president. Why? Because he sent me a present, which is more than any of the other bastiches in the running ever did for me. Never underestimate the power of a good bribe.

I just posted a Very Special Halloween edition of Internal Monologue.

Yes, but that didn't stop me from doing it just now.

Happy Hallowe'en and stuff, people.

"Freakylinks" being pulled from schedule -- well, that just figures. I wish Farscape would hurry and come back on.

I updated my about me page and added links to a couple of fairly recent pictures of myself that I don't absolutely hate.

Today's (sorta) Halloween Related Link O' the Day (because it's freaky): Sci Fi Happens

I don't watch the show, but I took the Sex and the City Personality Test anyway. I most resemble Miranda. Interesting that I came out to match the redhead. More interesting is that that paragraph is actually kind of accurate, except for the part about corporate ambition. More interesting still is that she's wearing my current outfit (except that her version probably cost a lot more than mine did). Scary.

*Squealing with delight*

Mike Nelson's Movie Megacheese! Thanks, Erich!

He sure is good to his harem girls.

If that actually happens, I just might start reading X-Men again.

(Thanks for the link, Peter.)

Stop me if this gets too confusing. He plays Vlad the Impaler in this week's "Dark Prince: The True Story of Dracula" on USA (Halloween night). He also played Dracula in "Buffy vs. Dracula." I hope he does a more convincing job in this movie than he did on Buffy. Anyway, he also played Anton, the guy whom Sarah Michelle Gellar's character ran off with at the end of her tenure on "All My Children." Just something to keep in mind if you're ever playing a BtVS version of the Kevin Bacon game.

Speaking of Buffy, the other night I watched "I Know What You Did Last Summer." Now, the first time I saw this movie, I'd never seen an episode of BtVS. Not by choice, mind you; it didn't start airing in my area until last year. I knew who Sarah Michelle Gellar was and what she was famous for, but never having seen her in action, I didn't have a problem buying her as a beauty queen victim. This time, however, as she was running for her life from the guy, tripping over her high heels, I found myself shouting at the screen, "Dammit, Buffy! Just turn around and drop-kick the hooked bastard! Why the hell are you taking that shit from a mortal? Kick his ass already!"

Maybe it's a good thing I'll be taking a break from BtVS this week.

I just spilled coffee on my blouse. Go me.

Okay. So, um, "Blair Witch 2." It didn't scare me, but it was an intriguing enough story that it didn't totally suck. Spoilers ahoy ...









<REVIEW>

<SPOILERS>

So if you watch "Shadow of the Blair Witch" on SciFi, or if you just visited the web site, then you know all about last year's Coffin Rock massacre, for which Blair Witch Hunt tour guid Jeff Patterson and two accomplices were arrested and are currently undergoing trial (note to the reality impaired: not really, it's all just the set up for the movie). So those ever helpful folks at Artisan Entertainment went over the video footage that was taken on the tour and put together a re-enactment of the events based on the footage, as well as interviews and the testimony of the accused. This re-enactment is distributed to theaters as the sequel to "The Blair Witch Project" and is titled, for reasons you'd have to read the web site to understand because they never explain it in the movie, "Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2."

It starts out promisingly enough, with footage of media coverage of all of the hype surrounding the first movie, intercut with interviews with supposed Burkittsville residents, many of whom have found ways to capitalize on the fame that the faux documentary has brought to their once quiet little town. Among the latter is the movie's central character, Jeff Patterson. We are then introduced through disturbing flashback sequences to Jeff's history as a patient in a mental institution. Then the movie actually starts. Jeff has combined his Blair Witch obsession with his business acumen and started "The Blair Witch Hunt" tours, promising tourists that they will walk where the witch herself once tread.

Four people answer Jeff's internet ad, including a bitter, whiny, modern-day Wiccan who wants Elly Kedward (the Blair Witch herself) to be her mentor, a psychic goth chick who's just along because she liked the movie and she thought it would be fun, and a writer couple who are taking the tour strictly for research purposes. The five head into the woods where they set up camp among the ruins of Rustin Parr's house. Jeff sets up cameras everywhere, hoping to capture an Elly Kedward haunting on film. Just as everyone starts having fun, a rival tour group stops by, and the two groups argue over who gets to spend the night in the ruins. Jeff's group convinces the second group to camp out on Coffin Rock instead. The second group leaves, and Jeff and company begins to party.

Come daybreak, the five awaken to an inexplicably trashed campsite, with no memory of having gone to sleep. Jeff's cameras are all ruined and the writers' notes are so much confetti. The goth chick has a psychic vision that the video tapes from the cameras are still intact and hidden in the house's foundation. Jeff checks, and sure enough, there are the tapes -- in the exact same place where Heather's original film footage was supposedly found. Spooooky. The group gathers up their things and, after a brief stop off at a hospital so that one of the women in the group can finish having a miscarriage, head back to Jeff's home in an abandoned factory warehouse, where they begin to review the tapes and try to piece together what occurred during the missing five hours. Hijinks ensue.

Along the way, Jeff & co. learn that the tourists they sent to Coffin Rock were brutally murdered in what appeared to be a recreation of the original Coffin Rock Massacre that Heather told us all about in the first film. They also learn that the Sherrif, who really doesn't like Jeff at all, considers them all to be the prime suspects. Meanwhile, back at the warehouse, two members of Jeff's group die, conveniently bring the death toll to seven, once again repeating the cycle of seven deaths every forty years or so that began after Elly Kedward's banishment and was hoped to have ended with Rustin Parr's child murders. Jeff and the remaining tourists are arrested, and we, the audience, are left to wonder: Did they really do it, and they're lying, hoping to cop an insanity plea? Or did they do it, but they're telling the truth about having no memories of the murders, because the Blair Witch made them do it? Or, are they truly innocent, and the Blair Witch did it all, including tampering with their video footage to make them look guilty, thus setting them up to take the fall?

Like I said, intriguing story, nice continuance of the "legend," but aside from some eerie imagery and some gorey slice & dice shots of the massacre, it's no more unsettling than some episodes I've seen of "Unsolved Mysteries."

Which is frustrating, because it had potential. I think that where the filmmakers failed was that they didn't stick to the original formula. Presenting the film as a re-enactment of events which we already know to be fictitious made me feel too separated from the events depicted in the film to really be impacted by them. I think that if they had instead shown us the "actual footage" from Jeff & the gang's video cameras, and intercut that with their testimonies, and then left us to draw our own conclusions about what "really" happened, they could have had a hell of a scary movie, as well as a great sequel. As it was, it played like an episode of one of those paranormal investigation shows, and it just didn't do anything for me.

</SPOILERS></REVIEW>

So last night Freakylinks actually worked that pterodactyl picture into the plot. Cool. That show is fun. I'm really glad I stuck with it beyond its stupid pilot. I like they way they treat the web site like it's really run by the people portrayed in the show, even though the portrayal of actually running a web site on the show is not all that realistic, but still, a good time is had by all, so that can be forgiven. Leave it to those Blair Witch guys to use the web to blur the lines between reality and fiction in such an intriguing manner.

Speaking of the Blair Witch guys, I'm going to see Blair Witch 2 later. I'm conflicted. The first movie scared me. I mean, it bothered me. I had to sleep with the lights on for a week. Even now I shudder every time I think of Mike standing in that corner. It wasn't the fun kind of scared that usually comes with watching horror movies, and I'm not eager to repeat the experience. However, if this new movie doesn't scare me like that (and I don't really expect it to), I'll be pretty let down. I just really hope it doesn't suck.

Yeah! My credit card payment just kicked in! Goin' to get meself a DVD player ...

Poor guy. Feel better.

Today's Halloween Related Link O' the Day: Halloween Suck! And, in a half-assed attempt to make up for such easy linkage, a bonus: Old Halloween Suck!

This guy I listen to on the drive to work has a segment called The College of Obscure Knowledge, kind of a local Christian version of The Straight Dope. This morning he was talking about a 16th century printing of the Bible that was recalled because they left the word "not" out of the seventh commandment, making it read "Thou shalt commit adultery." I had to laugh, because it reminded me of Good Omens, and the extremely rare print of the "Buggre Alle This" Bible. Which led to a tangent of thinking of my favorite character, Dog, and all of the hijinks which ensued therein. Before I knew it I had a huge grin on my face.

Seriously, people, that's possibly one of the funniest books ever written. Go read it. Or, if you're too lazy, wait for the movie.

By the by, the same guy also read the news, and I heard him say something about Al Gore telling voters out in California that voting for Nader will hurt his chances of winning the presidency.

Methinks our vice president does not quite comprehend the purpose of this whole voting thing.

Hey, kids! It's the-- eh, you know what it is. Check it out: Comic Book Universe Battles: Great Pumpkin vs. Jack Skellington

Okay. So I write that (in third person, even though it's painfully obvious that "she" is really me), then I head out to lunch, wrapped up in my own little world where I'm enthusiastically throwing myself a pity party. I get on the elevator, and vaguely notice that there is a guy on there with me. We start down, just him and me and my self pity, then I realize that he's speaking. "mumbled garbled raining outside," I hear.

I jerk around and squint at him. "What? Crap, did you just say it's raining outside? It better not be, I didn't bring my umbrella."

"No," he said, looking slightly frightened, "I just said I wonder if it's raining."

"Oh. I don't know," I say with a shrug, and turn back around to face front, and continue the ride in silence.

So then I meet up with my friends, and we're walking to the greasy hamburger joint, and we pass this car from which I hear "... know how to get to Houston Ave?" Now, he doesn't say "avenue," he says "ave," as in, rhymes with cave. I glance over and see that he's looking straight at me. I note that he's a foreigner, so I forgive the "ave" bit, but I look ahead and keep walking without responding. Before I can pass the car he repeats the question, so we all stop and turn around. "Um," I say, standing way back on the sidewalk with my arms crossed in front of me, "I'm pretty sure it's that way." I then point in the general direction of the street he's looking for. He mutters a half-hearted thanks, then goes on his way, and we continue to the hamburger place.*

See, now this is what I'm talking about. These were both nice enough looking guys, both young, and both looked professional. I could have handled both situations much better than I did, but I was too busy feeling sorry for myself over not being able to find somebody to love that I didn't even recognize potential opportunities until after the fact. I do that sort of thing all the time, and I never seem to learn. I guess I'm pretty hopeless in that respect.

*To my credit, or at least to make myself look somewhat better, when he asked for directions the first time, one of my friends just said "No" and kept walking without even looking at him, and the second time, they all just stood back and looked at him, and I think a couple of them pointed in the same direction I did. I think they were all thrown by the way he said "ave."

I finally updated Internal Monologue. It's a really uplifting piece. Yes, that was sarcasm.

Just made minor changes to the daily list. Added Terrence and finally fixed Erich's link. See? I always get around to stuff eventually.

"1. Out.
2. For.
3. A.
4. Walk.
...
5. Bitch."

Hee!

Oh my God, the Ewoks theme song!

Well, at least Wang Chung's not in my head anymore.

Okay! As for my birthday, well ... here's my wishlist. You've got plenty of time to start saving ...

One more "Angel" observation: When Angel had Darla down in that old convent/waterworks, those were some of the worst vampire face transitions I'd ever seen on either show.

Today's Halloween-related Link O' the Day: The Witches of Burkittsville

"It obviously has paranormal origins."
"How can you tell?"
"Well, it's so shiny."

That's right, kids, it's that time again, time for Jean's Weekly Buffy & Angel Prattlings. Spoilers to follow ...


I love Xander Harris. He is exactly the kind of guy I tend to fall for in real life. That's neither here nor there, it just needed to be said, because lately I've found myself falling just a wee bit harder each week for our cranky pale blondie-bear, Spike. Xander will always be my first love, but ... Spike. Spike, Spike, Spike, Spike, Spike. I love you. You rule.

Sorry, I just needed to get that out of the way.

I hear that Riley's going to be leaving the show soon. Good.

The new Big Bad, the Beast, or the Unnamed Evil, whatever ... she was actually pretty funny.

My theory about Dawn was pretty much just wrong. So Buffy's stuck with a little sister, whom she knows is not really her little sister, but rather is the human embodiment of some kind of key to the immortal plane, but she has to go along with the charade to protect the key from falling into the hands of Red Dress and unleashing a terrible evil upon the world. And Dawn has no idea that she's not really Buffy's little sister.

This was really kind of a touching episode for me. Being the middle child, I have both a big sister and a little sister, so I could relate to both sides. I know what it's like to want to hang out with big sis, and how it feels to be ignored and shoved aside, so I really felt for Dawn. I couldn't get angry at Buffy for her attitude, though. See, my big sister is 10 years older than me, so by the time my little sister -- the baby -- was born, big sis was already out of the house and getting ready to start having kids of her own. So for the most part, it was just me and little sister. And do you know what? The baby of the family really does get special treatment, and it's really, REALLY hard to watch. The rules that applied to you and your older sibs just don't seem to apply any more, and if you point out that this is unfair, you're branded the bad guy and accused of being petty and immature. So I completely understood where Buffy was coming from.

However painful sibling rivalry is, though, I wouldn't trade my little sister for anything, so I really liked the ending, with Buffy accepting Dawn and making up with her, and maybe realizing that their relationship is as much a blessing as a curse. Sisters are funny that way.

I don't really have that much to say about Angel. Last night's episode felt a lot more like the season opener than the season opener did. Darla's human. That surprised me. If they mentioned that little tidbit befor, I missed it.

I saw Juliet Landau in the opening credits and said "Yay, Drusilla!" I also saw Elizabeth Rohm in the credits and said "Yay, Kate!" But then they got to Kate and I remembered that she's a whiney little bitch, so I don't think I'll be doing that again.

Gunn is still growing on me.

And I still have "Wang Chung" stuck in my head, but at least it's the original version and not Angel's rendition. Bless his untalented little unbeating heart.

That's it for Jean's Weekly Buffy & Angel Prattlings. Apparantly there won't be any prattlings next week, because there will be reruns. Which pretty much ruins my Halloween plans ...

No. I thought about it, but rejected it for the same reason I never bought myself a PS1. If I had one of those things in the house I would never, ever get anything accomplished ever again.

As soon as my last credit card payment kicks in I'm going to go buy a DVD player. My next gadget goal: to get something bigger than a 13" to hook it up to.

Since I wrote about that spider web I keep feeling like things are crawling around on my scalp. I really hate that.

Eyuh. I'm having not such a good morning. Allergies are making my nose and eyes run, my eye is all swolen and red and stinging, and bright light hurts. And when I went to start my car this morning the battery was dead, so I had to go back in and wake my mom and ask to borrow her van. Then I drove off in said van without remembering to get my parking permit out of my car, so I'll probably get a ticket. Then I get here, and he tells me the story of how his sister got engaged, and I couldn't have written a more romantic scenario, which is just disgusting. I'm happy for Dawn, but I'm a petty, bitter person, so naturally I'm jealous as hell.

I should have known, when I took my dog outside first thing this morning and walked right into a humongous-ass spiderweb and had to spend several minutes getting it out of my hair, that today would be one of those days where I should just go back to bed and let the whole thing pass me by.

I've also got "Wang Chung" stuck in my head. That's not helping matters any.

It worked! Everybody, meet Terrence. Terrence, meet everybody.

Ain't we having some fun now?

Woo-hoo! My Pitch Black DVD shipped today! Come the weekend, I shall be the proud owner of a DVD, bringing me ever so closer to joining up with the rest of the 21st century. Now I just need to get myself one of them thar DVD players, and I'll be set.

It's that time again, kids! Time for the Halloween-related link o' the day (yes, that's right, there's a Halloween link o' the day. Starting yesterday, with that scary clown site. Just go along with it, 'kay?): Halloween Urban Legends

I'm trying to talk my friend Terrence into starting a blog. Mainly just because it would be nice if at least one of my "real life" friends had a web presence that I could link to, just to prove that I actually do have "real life" friends. So let's all send bloggy brainwaves to Terrence to try and will him to jump on this hit parade to bloggerville. Go Terrence! Go Terrence! It's your birthday! Have a party!

Oh, shit. You know what? It really is his birthday next week. I need to go shopping. Not sure what to get him. Oh, I know! How 'bout I set him up his own blog?

Clowns. Who needs 'em?

Mmm'mmm, Vin.

Yesterday was kind of nice. It would have been really nice if I hadn't had to go to Wal-Mart. Even that wouldn't have been too bad if I hadn't had to pick up my vacation pictures from the photolab, where little sister was working. She wants to set me up with a janitor named Ralph. I told her I don't do blind dates. She called me a snob and said her husband told her I'd think I was too good to go out with a janitor. I think if we'd been at home instead of in the middle of her workplace that conversation would have eventually ended up in one of our kidney-punching, hair-pulling, name calling sessions. Or at least a slap fight.

Anyway, nothing against Wal-Mart janitors, but I'm not going to subject myself to an evening out with a strange man whom my teen-aged sister thinks is perfect for me based solely on the fact that he likes Star Trek. I guess I'm just funny that way.

I can see what's coming, though. Now that I'm the only single sibling, they're all going to gang up on me and try to assimilate me into their little club. It's starting already. And the really frustrating thing is, their only prerequisite for finding me a date is that he likes Star Trek. Please. I'm so over Star Trek. Except for watching Voyager every week. And except for watching the reruns whenever they come on. And except for eagerly anticipating the next movie, because it's an even number, so it probably won't suck. But other than that I'm pretty much over Star Trek. They never ask the important questions, like what are his beliefs, does he like children and small animals, does he sing or play a musical instrument, does he dig Dragonball Z, and is his personality and sense of humor exactly like Xander's? Come on, people! If you can't get it right, then don't meddle in my love life (or complete lack thereof).

But other than that it was a nice day. It was chilly enough to wear my favorite sweater, and rainy without being stormy. I hung out and read the paper, then drove around in the rain listening to VAST (the first CD, not the new one. I haven't heard the new one yet, I'm a little dubious about the changes he's made. Anybody heard it? Should I get it?) before I went to Wal-Mart and encountered little sister. After I got home the rest of the day was spent watching TV and reading Batman comics.

I watched that Blair Witch special on SciFi. Something tells me that that special makes a better sequel than the new movie. I also watched this documentary on A&E about geniuses, which was pretty interesting. Did you know that Heddy Lamar, the movie star, came up with the technology to shuffle radio frequencies to keep them from getting jammed? Guess she was more than just a pretty face.

I overslept this morning. Slept right through both alarms (because it takes at least two of them to wake me ... perhaps I should consider adding a third). I got to work an hour late and when I walked by my supervisor, she said she wished she could've slept in this morning too.

Slept in? I don't know, I don't really think of oversleeping and sleeping in as the same thing. Sleeping in is when I sleep secure in the knowledge that I don't have anywhere to be and wake up gradually of my own accord (or because my cat's biting my toes because she's hungry and wants me to get my ass out of bed and feed her, whichever comes first), then lay there for another 20 minutes or so, just because I can.

That's nothing like what happened this morning, when it finally sunk in that the droning, screeching noises I was hearing were not coming from the police cars in my dream, and I opened my eyes and looked for the source of the offending sound, saw the time, said to myself "oh, shit!" as I jumped out of bed, then ran around in a panick like that bear from that old Disney cartoon where the park ranger forced the bears to clean up all the trash in the park before he'd give them anything to eat -- that cartoon was sadistic and sad -- trying to decide whether I could actually get around in 10 minutes and make it to work on time, or if I should just call and say I'd be late. That's not exactly the most easy-going way to start your morning, let alone your work week.

So I called, then got around in my usual manner, and made it to work with only an hour to make up for this evening (which is no problem because I always hang out here for an hour after work waiting for traffic to ease up, anyway). It's all good.

I'm having a blueberry bagel, with blueberry flavored cream cheese, which looks like, tastes like, smells like, and has the exact consistency of blueberry yogurt, which is actually kind of gross. I think from now on I'll forego the flavored cream cheese.

They're added. Plus I managed to get this random background image script to work on the first try. Go me.

Like Phantom of the Opera? Like Dragonball Z? Then you'll like this.

G'night, everybody!

Happy, happy! Scarecrow signed my guestbook over at the Realm. Hardly anybody ever signs my guestbook. That's why I don't put one on here. It would just be day after day of rejection and dejection when nobody signs it.

Anyway, Scarecrow, along with Fluffy Battle Kitten and Walking Bitch's White Trash Diner, are all going on my daily list over there one of these days when I get around to adding them. Maybe when Blogger stops being so iffy.

Here, Peter. Read this and feel better.

Spider-Man movie news - Alicia Witt, apparantly, is the new Mary Jane Watson.

I've never been into Spider-Man (Peter Parker has always been a bit too much of a whiner for my tastes), hence I haven't really been following the developments of the movie. I'm just amazed that for once the makers of a comic book movie have cast someone whom I don't have to strain my brain to imagine in the role. I mean, casting a natural redhead to play a redheaded character? And an actor who is actually roughly the same age as the character they're going to play? What a concept!

No offense, Famke.

Actually, it's one of my dirty little secrets (or at least, it was till now) that I saw Pitch Black 3 times in the theaters (once in it's regular run then twice at the dollar movies). The first time I saw it, I didn't really think much of the movie (I think my initial thoughts on the film are around here somewhere ... oh, here they are), but I was completely smitten with Vin Diesel (Riddick), and went to see it again just for him. The second time the movie's flaws didn't stand out, and I noticed a lot of things that I hadn't noticed before that actually made it a really likeable movie. The third viewing convinced me that there is a lot more to like about it than not. And not just Vin Diesel.

Plus, it piqued my interest in Claudia Black, which led me to watch "Farscape," which is a really damned good show.

Lessening the degrees of separation between Star Trek and X-Men, it also occurred to me last night that Famke Jansen once played an alien who fell in love with Captain Picard in the episode "The Perfect Mate".

I went with Terrence & Tess last night to see X-Men again at the dollar movies. I love that movie. That was the third time I'd seen it. I had an easier time this time around accepting Famke Jansen as Jean Grey, and James Marsden (he's from Oklahoma, y'know ... turns out he went to OSU at the same time as Tess, though if they ever crossed paths she doesn't remember) as Cyclops. I still couldn't reconcile Ian McKellan with my idea of Magneto, but it occurred to me that he would make an excellent Ra's Al Ghul.

Speaking of X-Men, go watch the new cartoon trailer.

Chat with Vin Diesel tonight on MSN. *SIGH* It's probably a good thing I won't be home tonight. I'd hate to risk making a fool of myself in a chat room in front of the man I'm going to marry.

I think I'm going to have to go rent Pitch Black this weekend.

Cool! I think I know what I'm getting my youngest nephew for Christmas ...

Oh, and also like Buffy, in my montage I'm always wearing glasses. But they're writerly glasses.

I said I was through talking about Buffy, but I changed my mind. I liked her "studying montage" fantasy that she relayed to Willow. I'm the same way with writing. I go a while without writing regularly (bad Jean!) and start to get these romanticized images of myself being all writerly, sitting at my little desk just tapping away, filled to the brim with inspiration, breezing through a story, getting it right the first time, and it all happens (in my head) in short music video style scenes to the musical stylings of ... some band with writerly musical stylings. Actually, I used to always listen to Malcom McLaren during my Serious Writing Sessions, but lately it's been Sarah Brightman--but that's neither here nor there. Back to my point, which is, that once I've been inspired enough by my little romantic montage fantasy to actually sit down and write, I quickly remember that the reality is usually closer to sitting for long minutes staring at the screen, typing something, staring at it for a while, deciding it's bad, deleting it, staring at the blank space, trying again, and repeating the process over and over again for hours, and hopefully getting a few pages out of the process. Although, once in a great while you actually are filled to the brim with inspiration, and it all happens just like in the montage. Those are the moments that make all of the tediousness that comes with being a writer the rest of the time worthwhile.

Man, I really hate it when I publish a post to the wrong blog.

Heather Havrilesky! Bulma shower pics! Vegeta naked (woo)! Foot stalker! Ritalin Ritalin Ritalin!

There, that ought to get me some traffic.

You people and your wacky search strings ...

Time again for Jean's weekly Buffy & Angel prattlings (possible spoilers for anyone who hasn't yet seen them):


Spike loves Buffy. BWA-Ha ha hahahahahaha! But, really, who didn't see that coming?

Spike may be the only person on the show whom the writers love to torture more than Anya. It was funny when he fell into the grave after the "I will have your blood, Slayer" speech, but that sort of thing always happens to him after he tries to be Mr. Hellacool Sinister Vampire. His mishaps are becoming predictable. Still funny, tho'.

Favorite Angel moments, both involving Cordy: "You can't fire me, I'm vision girl." Followed by sticking her tongue out at Angel; and ...

While running after the van that just kidnapped this week's damsel-in-distress whose name currently escapes me, so we'll just call her Carrie, and shouting: "It's okay to squash those guys!"

I'm not sure whether Gunn is growing on me or if I'm just starting to get used to him, but he didn't bug me as much this week as in previous episodes.

Okay, that's all for the Buffy talk. Oh, and Dark Angel was pretty good, too. I didn't expect to like that show, but I do. Which probably means it will be cancelled soon, because that's the way these things usually go. Same with Freaky Links, but if that one gets axed I'll only miss it as long as it takes for SciFi to start showing new episodes of Farscape again.

I'm eating lunch at my desk today, listing to Whistle Down The Wind as I munch.

I hate eating at my desk. It's bad enough that I'm out in the open, so all of my office mates can walk by and watch me eat, but I'm also by the front door, so everybody next door at Ernst & Young can walk by and watch me eat, too. I wouldn't be concerned if not for the fact that they've got a couple of hotties working over there, and if not for the fact that just the other day one of them walked by and looked in at me just in time to see me shove an entire Hostess Gem into my mouth.

Hey, it's not like I've ever claimed to be ladylike.

I'm trying to be a responsible voter, I really am. I've taken about all I can take of Bush and Gore, so I've been checking out the alternatives: Ralph Nader and Howard Phillips.

I am SO not able to give a shit about this election.

Bake the hall in the candle of his brain.

Last night, after Roswell (because sci-fi/supernatural teen dramas always take precedence, donchaknow), I sat down and finished the new ending to my book. So I've completely rewritten the beginning and the ending. Now I just need to go through and make sure everything in between lines up with the new stuff. That seems simple enough until I pull up the whole 300+ page manuscript that I've already edited half a dozen times. Then it gets a wee bit daunting. Soon, though, I think I'll be ready to send it out into the world again.

Also on the writing front, still no response from that magazine on that article I turned in a few weeks ago.

It occurred to me last night (while I was staring at the screen thinking of all of the other things I could be doing other than writing ... I always get ideas when I'm supposed to be concentrating on something else) that this here weblog format would be a good venue for some round-robin type story telling. What do you think? Anybody interested in being part of a story blog?

Happy Halloween.

For Erich

I want to designate myself as a traffic cop. Not the kind that polices actual traffic violations, but one that polices stupid drivers.

When I was little my big sister had this pad of joke citations. They looked like traffic tickets, but the cited violations were things like "public display of nose picking," "excessive bo," "stupidity," etc. In place of a fine there was a curse: "May the fleas of a thousand camels forever infest your armpits." I could get one of those, but the violations would be things like "driving at or below the speed limit in the left lane," "failure to observe the zipper pattern while merging," or "obviously never properly learned how to drive." I could probably go through an entire pad of tickets just on my way to work in the morning. Now to figure out how to distribute the tickets accordingly without getting my ass kicked ...

Of course, I'd leave the part about the fleas.

At long last, I've posted a new (well, new to you) story, Patch, in the Words section. Maybe this sort of thing will become a habit ...

I really must get my digital camera in working order and start carrying it around with me. On my way home from work Friday, I saw one of the most beautiful sights I've ever seen. There was a double rainbow stretching for miles beside the highway. Both bows were complete, which is pretty rare (at least according to what I've seen of rainbows), and the really cool thing was, the colors in each bow ran in opposite directions from the other. So from the top down it went VIBGYOR, space, ROYGBIV. I had to pull over and get out in the rain to gawk at it until it started to fade. I wish I'd had a camera with me. It was so unbelieveably gorgeous.

Huzzah! I've found the missing portion of my chapter! I'm also eating some baked fudge left over from yesterday's monthly catch-all birthday/promotion/farewell celebration party, so I'm in chocoholic heaven. Don't good things come in threes? Oh yeah, it's Friday. That's always good. Oh, wait, it's Friday the 13th. Does that cancel it all out? I guess it's a good thing I'm not really superstitious. Besides, I had an encounter with a homeless man on my lunch hour (not Yelling Man, but close enough) that pretty much filled my wierdness quota for the day.

BLOOD THE LAST VAMPIRE -- Oh my, but this looks cool.

I have sounds from the Tick cartoon on my work PC. The asterisk sound is Tick cheering "All RIGHT!"

Recently, for some unknown reason, every time I check something off of my task list in Outlook, a message box pops up saying "Please save the task order by clicking blah blah blah" and I have to click okay before I can move on.

This would be extremely annoying if not for the fact that every time I complete a task, I get cheered on by the Tick.

I've been telling my friend Tess about this Snickers commercial for months, but she's never seen it, and has been questioning whether or not I hallucinated the whole thing.

I'm writing and listening to Nick Drake on the virtual juke box and everyone is leaving me alone to concentrate.

Sometimes, life is pretty good.

YellingMan.com - I've been yelled at by this guy before. It was kind of a frightening experience.

I've been using an inordinate amount of ellipses today ... and improperly, at that.

Gentlemen, a word of advice: If you feel you must stare at a woman, for whatever reason, at least have the decency to look away once you've been caught staring. To continue to stare after she's noticed you staring, especially if you do so every single time you see her, and especially if this sort of thing has been going on for months and she's afraid to even go to Arby's for lunch because you're always there with the staring and you never make any move to speak to her and you don't even attempt to be subtle about it ... well that's just creepy. Stop it.

Okay ... last week Anya got knocked down by a vamp and hit her HEAD on the stove and before taking her to the hospital someone remarked that she had a nasty HEAD injury ... so when did putting your arm in a sling become a viable treatment for a concussion?

On Dark Angel, when Max grabbed that woman and jumped over the side of the bridge, and then held her dangling over the gorge while she slid down that cable ... that was pretty cool right there.

Dammit! I finally psyched myself up to stay after work and actually write something for once, and actually pulled up my novel to work on the rewrites, and suddenly half the department decides to stay late, and they all think I'm still on duty. So every few minutes somebody's coming up here to my desk -- ignoring my headphones, ignoring the fact my phone is forwarded to voice mail, ignoring the fact that all of my desk lights are turned off, and ignoring the fact that I'm ignoring them -- to ask me for help with something. It's making it just a little bit hard to get into a creative flow. To top it off, I finally managed to read through my chapter one rewrite, only to find that a good portion of it is missing. It's been months since I worked on this thing, I don't remember what I wrote, but I know it was good, and now it's gone.

*grumble*

I'm going home now to watch Buffy. I'll try to be a writer again tomorrow.

AdCritic.com: Nike - Chainsaw - this commercial got pulled from the Olympics coverage, and got a Jeer in last week's TV Guide, for being sexist and too scary for network television.

You people really need to lighten up.

Every time I add Rory to my daily links he turns around and shuts down his site a few weeks later. I'm starting to take it personally.

No, no, no. Not the much rumored, much hyped, yet-to-be, live-action Batman Beyond movie. At the moment I couldn't give a rat's ass about that, especially with the persistent Keanu casting rumors that keep floating around. I'm talking about a new animated movie that's supposed to bridge the gap between the old animated series and Batman Beyond, and explain what happened to Robin, Nightwing, etc. The animated portion of the Batman franchise has consistently been better than it's live-action counterparts, and this new entry is reportedly at least as good as Mask of the Phantasm, which is considered by most fans to be the bast Batman movie in the entire franchise, live-action or animated. At least, that's what those who saw the advanced screening copy of the version that was supposed to come out two weeks from now said about it, but that might not be true anymore if they go and chop it up so that it doesn't frighten small children and piss off politicians.

On the live-action front, I'm way more psyched about "Year One," but even with Frank Miller working on the script and the raves director Darren Arenofsky is getting for Requiem for a Dream, at this point I don't trust Warner Bros. to do it justice. I'm hopeful, but I'm not letting my expecations run too high.

But then again, I fully expected "X-Men" to suck ...

Today I cancelled my pre-order for Return of the Joker. I'd paid for it with gift certificates. I used them to order Pitch Black (Unrated Version) instead.

Now to procure a dvd player ...

Like I said earlier, I also watched several season/series premieres this weekend. Here is what I watched, and what I thought about it:

"The Fugitive" - Not quite as suspenseful as I'd hoped, but still pretty good for a redo of a redo. I'll probably watch this regularly, as long as it doesn't conflict with new episodes of "The Invisible Man" on Sci-fi.

"Freaky Links" - I'd say this was a disappointment, but I didn't really have very high expectations to begin with. The pilot was less than terrifying, and actually rather stupid. I'll give it a couple more chances to hook me. If it hasn't been cancelled yet after that, I'll probably watch it on nights when "Farscape" isn't on.

"Xena" - I love Ares, and there was a lot of him in this episode. Hence, I loved this episode. I hope they make a regular storyline out of Ares trying to deal with his mortality.

"Ed" - Ed was everything he was cracked up to be. His show wasn't bad, either. I'll probably watch it until Fox puts something on in that timeslot that I like better (i.e. "The Tick").

"Earth: Final Conflict" - I was really excited after seeing last season's finale about the direction it looked like this show would be taking, but all of those plot threads and surprises were neatly wrapped up in the premiere. Lilly was back, but now she's gone again, Da'an didn't actually die, Sandoval's not in trouble and he's still an asshole, and Auger left but got replaced with a female version. Whatever.

"Andromeda" - I'm going to hold judgement on this one until I see the second half of the pilot.

All that's left to look forward to now are the premieres of "X-Files" and "The Lone Gunmen." Come on, November!

Keywords for this weekend: Little Shop. Batman. New TV. Internet. More Batman.

I spent a good deal of the weekend online (whatever the problem was with my ISP that kept me from being able to log on for more that 5 minutes at a time over the last several months seems to have finally corrected itself), maintaining the Batman Beyond DVD petition and keeping abreast of the struggle.

I also spent a good deal of time watching series premieres. More on that later.

Saturday night my friend Tess and I went to see a local production of "Little Shop of Horrors." I'd never seen it live before, though I do have the original cast recording, so I knew that the show didn't have a happy ending like the movie. The show was good. Crystal & Chiffon could have used a little more practice on their choreography, other than that you never would have guessed it was a regional production.

One of the volunteer ushers at the theater was dressed like Batman. I don't know why. He wasn't actually dressed like Batman, but he wore a Batman t-shirt, a Batman baseball cap, a Batman jacket, and, to complete the ensemble, a pair of gloves from a Batman costume. Like I said, I don't know why. I should have asked him to sign my petition.

Continuing the Batman theme, Nephew #1 finally returned my copy of The Compete Frank Miller Batman, a nice leatherbound edition containing both "Year One" and "The Dark Knight Returns." I'm pretty happy to have gotten that back.

It is time now for me to go have lunch with my supervisor, so this post will have to be continued ...

Continuing the "Jean's a geek" theme, I've spent most of my blog readin' & writin' time the last couple of days putting together this petition site to protest extra edits that are reportedly being made to the feature length "Batman Beyond" movie that was due out this month. Rumors are running rampant that the release date was delayed so that the finished film, which advance screeners reported was a masterpiece, could be toned down to be more kid friendly, with no plans in the works for an uncut release for us older fans of the show. It had me pissed off enough to actually do something instead of my usual tactic of sitting around and complaining loudly. This is turning into a battle over censorship in the media. Please go read the petition, and if you agree with what it stands for, add your name to it.

Northeastern Oklahoma weather, which always has its fair share of wierdness, has in one day completely skipped autumn and gone straight into winter. Yesterday it was in the 80's, today it's in the 40's and falling. Damn. Hopefully it'll straighten out and find a middle ground. I love fall, I'll be awfully cranky (crankier, I should probably say) if I'm deprived of it.

You can tell it's going to be a slow day here at Ritalin Junkie when I resort to talking about the weather....

Save the Joker - Because I'm on a quest to prove to the world just how much of a spastic fangirl I can be.

"Harmony's Minions" would be a good name for a band.

I'm liking Erich's redesign.

Today is all about neurotic obsessing over at Joker's Realm.

I told my mom that I want to learn to do what Willow and Tara do, but she got really quiet and made me go to my room.... she just doesn't understand about witchcraft.

That made me laugh.

I think I'm more interested in finding out what's up with Tara than where Dawn came from. Am I the only one that saw the mildly freaked out look on her face when Willow told her she's one of the good guys? Then there was that little item about her sabotaging one of Willow's spells last year ... something is up with that girl, I tell you.

Angel was okay, but I didn't see anything that qualified it as an "event."

I taped Dark Angel, but I went ahead and watched the second half. It, too, was okay. I'll watch it again, but I think it'll have to get better in order to build a large audience. That journalist guy was cute, though.

Dilemma: do I tape Buffy & Angel and watch Dark Angel, or vice versa? Or do I forego both in favor of the presidential debates?

Yeah, okay, I was just kidding with that last one.

I'm in the mood for it to be a rainy day, dark and chilly outside but warm and cozy inside with the glow of candles and a computer screen for light, melancholy music keeping my company while I craft something -- a web graphic, an essay, a story, it doesn't matter which.

Instead it's 85 degrees and sunny outside, cold and sterile inside, under the harsh, unforgiving glare of office lights, listening to showtunes because almost all of my mp3 files are showtunes -- but at least I'm able to craft something, some little nothing that might make somebody smile, or nod in understanding, or shake their head in disbelief.

Miniscule snippets of rushed creativity to sooth my misplaced mind. I suppose this is why I blog, and why I read blogs.

The rest would hurt too much if I didn't.

Good luck, Eleni!

BATMAN BEYOND dvd delayed - Darn them! Darn them all to Heck!

Real Video interview w/ Anthony Hopkins from the set of "Hannibal" - Have I mentioned that I cannot effing WAIT to see this movie?

Link courtesy of Aint It Cool News

French Masters. Almost Famous. Java Dave's. Fearful rewrites. Posting stories. Getting dressed.

Those could have been the keywords for my weekend, but sitting on the sofa in my comfy new pj's first thing Saturday morning, watching Batman Beyond with my smelly, dirty little poodle sprawled contentedly on his back beside me, with nothing to wear because I haven't done laundry in almost a month, the former set suddenly seemed much more appealing.

I'm such a homebody. I have all of these romantic little notions about going to art shows and frequenting little cafe's where I'll do all of my best writing, and going to live music venues to check out the local music scene, but aside from an almost weekly visit to the movies and the occasional live theater attendance, I don't get out much.

I'd blame it on the fact that I live at least 40 minutes away from all of the cool stuff I want to do, but even when I lived 5 minutes away from it all, I didn't do any of it. Despite my best intentions at being cultured, when I wake up on a crisp, clear Saturday morning, with the whole day ahead of me, the thought of having to put on makeup and fix my hair and pick out a nice outfit and leave the house suddenly doesn't sound like nearly as nice a day as pulling on some sweats, watching Xena and sorting my comic book collection.

Okay, so I'm a homebody and a geek; but that doesn't change the fact that Xena rocks.

Laundry. Batman. Pajamas and TV. Chips & salsa. Poodle maintenance. Sleep. Sunday paper. Frou-frou catalogues. Open windows. Christopher Moore.

Those are the keywords for my weekend, folks. Put them in any order you like.