I'm having another thought (scroll past the spoiler space)...

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It's late, and I'm sleepy, so bear with me if I don't explain this right. But I got the sense in tonight's ep that Spike's epiphany wasn't just about his mother, but also about the deliniation between the demon and the human soul. That creature who came on to him was not his mother. She was a demon. Something which I think Spike has always understood intellectually, but has never really *got.* Because I don't think Spike ever thought of himself as two separate entities. He changed upon turning, yes; he became stronger, better (to his mind), more evil and more confident. But I think he truly believed he was still the same *person* inside, and that he still felt that way upon getting his soul back. He now had a conscience and a sharper memory of William's pain, but I think that he's always thought of himself as, essentially, William. A William who gave himself a makeover complete a new attitude and a new name to prove his mother wrong, to prove that he wasn't a weak little mama's boy (and has been trying to prove that ever since), but still William nonetheless. So I don't think it really occurred to him before that there was a clear deliniation and that other vampires were not the same people they were in life. Again, I think he understood the concept intellectually before tonight, but now he gets it on a gut level.

I think that's the primary difference between souled Spike and Angel. Angelus never confused himself with Liam. He knew what he was and what he was meant for. Introduce Liam's soul back into that mix, and sure there's going to be an identity struggle. Angelus had his own strong sense of identity separate from the human that he was, so, no, Angelus and Angel are not the same being. They don't identify with each other and they don't like each other and they each resent having to share a body and a brain with the other.

So, I don't think the two approaches we're being given are contradictory. I think they make sense. Angel is not Angelus, but Spike is William, because he never stopped being William. As such it's harder for Spike to separate the actions of the demon from those of the souled being and give himself a free pass from responsibility for the demon's actions. Unlike certain other recently re-ensouled vampires who don't say to certain other Slayers "Hey, sorry about about giving you up to the Beast and kicking your ass and biting you," but instead say "Sorry I wasn't around while you were here."