I know you’re dying to hear all about my vacation, but that can wait. Today I want to talk about the disturbing news regarding a lawsuit against the American Psychiatric Association and the makers of Ritalin that claims both parties conspired to create a market to turn America’s children into drug addicts by diagnosing them with a made up disorder.

In a word: bullshit.

Bob Seay, the About.com guide to Attention Deficit Disorder, raises some excellent points about the frivolousness of this lawsuit, so I won’t get into all of that.

It depresses me how much ADD is misunderstood by the general public, as well as by the media, who continue to feed misinformation to said public, thereby increasing this misunderstanding.

I still cannot believe how many people think that ADD = bad behavior, and that the only "cure" for it that’s necessary is more discipline or better parenting; or how many people automatically associate ADD with hyperactivity and childhood rambunctiousness. Hyperactivity is only one symptom of the disorder, and one that many people with ADD, including myself, do not suffer from.

I’ll tell you a little bit about my vacation: on my third day at Disney World, I kept forgetting to take my medication. Several times that day I had to fight to keep from breaking down and crying in the middle of the park. Twice I had to just drop what I was doing and go back to my hotel room to regroup. Why? Because everything was so overwhelming to my senses that my complex thought processes literally shut down. Several times I came to a point where I could not make one more decision, not even as simple a decision as whether to buy a Coke or bottled water at the concession stand, without losing it.

I get this way in my job sometimes, too, if I forget to take my meds. It gets to where I simply cannot function. It is not because I lack the discipline to push through and work past the point of exhaustion; and it’s not because I’m too lazy to do any more work. My brain just reaches a point where it can’t take any more. Sometimes all it takes is twenty or thirty minutes of "quiet time" -- time spent alone with very little sensory input during which my thought processes can regroup and recharge -- to return to a functional state of mind. Sometimes it takes a nap. Sometimes it takes a bubble bath followed by an entire night of sleep. However, I hardly ever get that way in the first place as long as I remember to take my Ritalin.

Imagine living a life in which you get lost even on the most routine routes because you miss exits or get thrown by construction and make wrong turns; in which you’re late every morning because you can’t find your car keys even though you know that you left them right there; in which you come home every night to a messy, disorganized living space and you can’t do anything about it, no matter how miserable it makes you, because your brain has reached that point where you can’t even decide whether to start by putting away the clean dishes in the dishwasher or picking the laundry off of the bathroom floor. This is my life. This is actually only a brief outline of what my life is like. Ritalin helps me to not lose my keys, to not lose my way, to clean my living quarters without getting distracted or overwhelmed, to keep track of my money, to do my job, and to function day to day as the intelligent, capable adult that I am.

Yet according to Richard Scruggs, the lead attorney behind the suit, there is nothing wrong with me that a little discipline can’t fix. I do not have a brain disorder, because according to Scruggs, such a disorder does not exist, and the medication that helps me function as a member of society is something I’m stupid enough to have been conned into taking by the makers of Ritalin and by the APA -- nevermind the fact that I, like a large portion of ADD patients, was diagnosed by my general practitioner who is NOT a psychiatrist, and that I take the generic form of Ritalin which is NOT manufactured by Novartis.

Nevermind also the report released this week by the UCLA School of Medicine that researchers have found a new -- but not the first -- genetic link to ADD, supporting the theory that it is hereditary.

This case is ridiculous, but the lawyers behind it have nothing to lose and billions of dollars to gain by pursuing it. The people whom the lawyers claim to represent, however, which would be anyone and everyone who has ever been diagnosed with ADD and prescribed Ritalin, have very little to gain and much to lose if the suit is successful. If the lawsuit prevails, claimants will split whatever is left after the attorneys take out their fees and pay off their "expert," Peter Breggin; each share will probably amount to just enough to buy a bottle of Ritalin. If successful, these claimants, along with the rest of the ADD population, will lose their right to pursue every option currently available to them to help them lead normal lives.

Not that I’m worried this will actually happen. I’m just tired of these wankers who believe they know better than I do what is best for my mental health, or who go around trying to get rich by spreading false propaganda about something I’ve struggled with my entire life.

We now return you to our regularly scheduled non-sequiturs.